I turn my headlamp off as I crouch down to pee on the side of the trail.
Pee breaks are inevitable when you are in the middle of nowhere.
I finish my business and made myself proper again and began walking toward the next aid station- my head staring up.
UP.
It's just past 1am and the stars are screaming with radiance.
The moon is a burnt orange as it lights up the trail and you can't look away- the view is mesmerizing.
The Big Dipper, Little Dipper, Cassiopeia and more. A perfect setting to learn astronomy.
I wiggle out of my daze and turn my headlamp back on, I'm on mile 85 and I'm ready to run.
There is no doubt in my mind that I'm going to finish this race.
That I will complete a 100 mile run.
Javelina Jundered
The 13th Annual Javelina Jundred will take place October 31 – November 1, 2015 staged out of the Pemberton Trailhead at McDowell Mountain Regional Park north of Fountain Hills, Arizona.
The 100 mile course is comprised of six full loops on the 15.3 mile Pemberton Trail and a half loop on the Pemberton and Tonto Tank Trails. Trails feature rolling single track through the Sonoran Desert. Run past giant Saguaro Cactus, granite boulders and dry wash-beds as you tour the most popular trail of McDowell Mountain Regional Park. 100 kilometer runners will compete four full loops of the Pemberton Trail.
Loops are run “washing machine” style, meaning each is reversed allowing you to keep an eye on the competition, see your friends and meet other runners all day and night.
Each loop features a gentle 600 foot climb from the start/finish at Javelina Jeadquarters to the high point near the foothills of the McDowell Mountain range. The trail dips in and out of wash beds on the far side of the course before descending back to the start finish. The trail is a mix of hard packed granite, rocks and sand.
Leading up to Halloween I was hesitant on participating in the race at all. These last few months I've been dealing with plantar fasciitis in my left foot and scaling my training back dramatically with some weeks of absolutely no running.
Frustrating doesn't even begin to describe how I feel? Depressed maybe?
I had felt as though I was doing everything I could possible, stretching, foam rolling, using a lacrosse ball, different foot exercises but nothing really got to the root of the problem.
It wasn't until I went to Rich, founder of VFE (Vision for enrichment), he comes to Crossfit Ganbatte every Thursday and Friday for sports massage appointments and I grabbed whatever hour he had available.
An hour with him did wonders, my hips, quads, calves were oh so tight and with his help he was able to relieve some of the tension. With his help and my consistent stretching/foam rolling and mobility work my plantar pain was almost non existent.
This was a week before Javelina.
I knew I was going to race no matter what but that idea of my foot not giving me any issues was a relief.
Unfortunately a week before the race I found out that both my pacers were unable to make the event anymore.
A situation I would have preferred happen a weeks or a month or two ago but what can you do.
Only a minor panic attack, a few tears shed and I was determined that I was capable of doing this on my own.
It's a big race, I figure there will be a few stragglers in a need of a run.
With that out of my mind I focused on the race.
That's a lie.
I didn't really focus on the race at all.
I read the course description once and I don't think I went back to the race website once.
My Halloween costume was my key focus.
I had to go to two different Goodwills to accumulate the necessary items for the complete outfit.
It was fun experience considering my go to costume every year is either Pocahontas or Frida Kahlo.
Thursday October 29th
Packed and ready to go. Carlos, my one and only crew member was to meet me at my apartment and off to Arizona we drove.
My oh so sweet cousin Megan who lives in Surprise, Arizona let us stay at her house that night.
I was thankful for such an incredibly soft bed to sleep in two nights before the race and her adorable son Cohen was a morning treat.
It was so wonderful being able to spend some time with them before we headed to Fountain Hills.
Friday October 30th
We left for Fountain Hills around 9am. Surprise was only an hour away.
We arrived and the campsite reminded me of Ragnar with all the tents sent up as well as the race canopies.
There was also pizza by Freak Brothers and a cute coffee car!
It was a great set up, an area to rent tents and another for people that set up their own.
We had opted to set up our own, or really I had opted for Carlos to set it up :)
By the time the tent was set up and we had unpacked the car everyone was starting to trickle in.
A majority of the Coyotes were already there and had set up too.
Pack it pick up went smoothly! Carlos and I both enjoyed all the merchandise they were selling and it was great to see SO MANY familiar faces.
My favorite part of Friday was the mini version of the Trail Running Film Festival that James put on.
The films were shown on a projector in Javelina Jeadquarters (JJ) as we all sat around drinking beer and eating pizza with the stars above keeping us company.
It was a magical night to say the least.
Saturday October 31st
Slept surprisingly well and almost didn't hear my alarm go off with my earplugs in. Whoops.
My costume was a hit already. My tent neighbors were surprised that I was even going to run in the getup but I was determined.
With everything set up and we were ready to go I was able to get coffee.
I was stopped maybe 5 or more times for pictures of my outfit.
Due to the hype of the morning seconds before the gun went off I realized I didn't eat breakfast other than my coffee but I wasn't too worried. I was still stuffed from the subway sandwich and vegan pizza I eat for dinner.
6:00 AM
The gun goes off and the race starts.
It was a trickling effect, there were so many people going through the starting line toward the trail. It felt like we were being herded toward the desert.
It started off pretty slow as everyone was trying to get into their groove.
After the first aid station I started running next to a girl who had complimented me on my costume.
We began to chat and I learned her name was Jen and she was from Portland.
You know how I love Portland and all it's glorious trails!
We began talking about the Rainshadow Races and some mutual friends we had together.
Oh- and how she is also vegan. Instant besties- come on!
I believe there is a Disney song with the lyrics "it's a small world afterall!" well, IT IS.
Both Jen and my intentions for the race was merely to have a running adventure, a good time on the trails really! To take it slow and have some fun- and that we did.
I can honestly say the 55 miles we ran together flew by. Although we were moving at a moderate pace, we were talking and signing the whole time which made time fly by.
I apologize to any runner that heard us sing Bohemian Rhapsody the first, second, or third time.
It was a blast!
Around mile 55 is when I continued running, I believe Jen said she needed to walk for a bit and I jammed.
We both agreed that when the time came, we had to think of our own races.
So I continued on.
I rolled in and out of Javelina Jeadquarters rapidly and back on the trails I went. It wasn't until the 6.5 dreadful miles from Coyote Camp to Jackass that I was starting to feel as though a pacer was necessary.
My eyes felt heavy and it took so much effort to keep them open.
I focused on my breathing. Deep breaths.
Let the healing in and the sore and tiredness out.
Let the healing in and the sore and tiredness out.
My eyes continued to get heavy and I was upset at myself.
I shouldn't had a pacer.
I turned my phone off airplane mode and sent Carlos a quick message saying I was moving extremely slow and that I would need him to pace me once I return to JJ (Javelina Jeadquarters).
Sent.
Put my phone back on airplane mode and I continued forward- at a very slow pace.
I am cool.
I am calm.
I am powerful.
i am a machine.
I call this Mikes pro tip of the day. The day before heading to Arizona I did a final 8 mile run with Mike and Juniper and he shared with me his mantra. It is something that helps you focus on breathing; keeping your heart rate low, your strength beyond mental boundaries, and your form even when things get rough.
Mile 65 I was repeating this to myself as I was working on my breathing.
This was the first point in the race that I felt really anything; at this point it wasn't pain, it wasn't soreness but fatigue.
It took me 2 miles and 33 minutes to convince myself to pick up the pace.
I've done three days of EWOD workouts at Crossfit Ganbatte and still had an 80 mile week and My body feels fresh compared to that week.
I told myself- stop complaining and start running.
"You feel great Sawna!"
I told myself.
And you know what?
The more I ran the better I felt.
As I began to run faster my body was slowly waking up.
This 100 mile journey is just starting to get good and my body is going to finish what it began.
The next three miles I ran.
You could hear the coyotes howling at the moon as it rose. It was a magical sound when normally it would've been a silent quest.
At that point I was still fatigued the idea of the next aidstation a mere few miles was an incenvite enough to continue forward.
I could hear Dom on the mic half a mile from Jackass Junction and running in James Varner and Andrea cheered me in.
If friendly faces doesn't perk you up then I don't know what will!
Jackass Junction is a party. Tempted by a bottle of whiskey I had to refrain from joining my friends.
I was on a different quest.
Katie helped me grab my drop bag and ensure I didn't spend too much time there.
James ran with me out of the aid station. His excitement was intoxicating. Or he was intoxicatingly excited.
Either way seeing everyone lifted my spirits and I ran.
What is wrong with me? I thought.
I've ran over 70 miles and I still feel good?
This can't be right!
Memories of AC100 at mile 70 flood back to me in a wave. How terrible I felt.
How I cried, really, cried from mile 60-75.
Today was no AC.
I quickly sent Carlos another message retracting my last message and stating how great I felt.
I continued a 10 minute or so pace past Rattlesnake Ranch and arrived at JJ feeling fresh.
Grabbing the only nutrition I've been eating all day:
Avocado
Dates
Pickles
and a Cliff bar to go.
That's it.
In past races I've had such terrible experience with my stomach I didn't want to alter any food choices now that I have at really good luck with what I was eating.
Normally "ass on fire" is a term I'd use in long races and those words were not in my dictionary this race.
(TMI I know- but it happens)
"Stick to what is working"
I told myself.
I jam out of JJ and jog out to Rattlesnake ranch for some coke. It was getting pretty cold at this point and thankfully I had my long sleeve tied around my waist and was able to put that on.
Grabbing some veggie broth I headed out, 78 miles in.
It was cold and the veggie broth warmed me up, unfortunately it also made me very tired.
Extremely fatigued.
fa·tigue
(fəˈtēɡ)
noun
1. extreme tiredness, typically resulting from mental or physical exertion or illness.
Being tired is a terrible feeling. One I know from driving.
The days I'd visit my family in San Diego and drive home really late- I would slap myself, turn the music up, keep the windows down just to stay awake.
I tried with all my might to keep my eyes open.
When I would walk it got extremely cold so I jogged.
Have you ever fell asleep while running?
Me either, until this point.
Awaking at the point of almost collapsing on the trail. It's a frightening experience but one I just could not avoid.
If I hiked it got cold. When I ran I still wouldn't wake up and I'd start to fall asleep.
I talked to myself alot at this point.
Swore to myself that having a pacer would assist me in the dreary hour.
Repeatedly stated
SAWNA YOU'RE AWAKE
SAWNA YOU FEEL GREAT
My body was NOT convinced.
There were runners and their pacers crouched on the side of the trail during this time.
At one point there was a couple I wanted to ask if I could sit next to them and have a nap.
I really regretted not having my costume on at this point- it would have been extremely convenient.
Weirdly enough my body wasn't having any other issue other that the overwhelming sensation to REST.
I am cool.
I am calm.
I am powerful.
i am a machine.
I worked on my breathing and slowly felt as those I was waking from the dead.
It took about 38 minutes and a little over 2 miles to begin feeling alive again.
Knowing that I was able to recover the first time gave me hope and I was able to convince myself to run again.
It began at an almost walking pace but what started off slow moved into a faster pace and I started to feel alive.
Mikes mantra slowly evolved into...
I am a (***king) machine.
and that is what I continued to tell myself.
People ask me "What do you think about when you run?"
Honestly, nothing other than my breathing, my form, my stride, my arms, basically how my body is performing.
The second my form starts to cave in, my poster slouched, my knees begin to hurt and it reminds me to keep my head up, shoulders back, knees up, pelvic bone not tucked out.
SO MANY CONSTANT REMINDERS- it's almost impossible to think of anything else.
Every time I repeated my new mantra:
I am a (***king) machine.
It reminded me that a well oiled machine can still perform despite troubles. You can still face difficulties on the trail but when focusing on form, breathing and what lies ahead- I can still perform to my best capabilities.
Running into Jackass Junction at mile 83 was a relief.
From Jackass Junction to Coyote Camp is 6.5 miles but it has a slight downhill.
Mentally it's easier to accept the mileage when I know it's downhill.
Getting to Coyote Camp, I felt pretty depleted. About 90 miles in and I just wanted to be done already.
Running in the night, in such a beautiful landscape, was rather difficult.
In the night, your constantly greeted with lights beaming in your eyes.
Despite not seeing faces I made sure I greeted every oncoming runner with a positive note.
The happier it seemed I sounded, the happier it actually made me.
Mind tricks.
I walked about a mile from Coyote camp to JJ. Once I began running, probably the same speed as my walk, a guy approached me and started conversation.
It was great! I picked up his speed and quickly realized how my walking felt worse than this ten or so minute pace we were running.
The mile we ran together we talked about the race, past races that got us here and how friendly everyone has been.
I was very grateful he ran next to me and let me join forces with his pace or I would have continued to walk.
Before we parted he reminded me that no matter what every step forward is getting you closer to the finis.
Keep the momentum going.
I must have spent a minute to say hi; eat a few slices of avocado, grab some dates and chug a cup of Coke and off I went.
It only took about half a mile for my adrenaline to go south again. I began to walk again in hopes that my last friend made would rejoin forces. Passing Coyote Camp I continued to hike and I could hear him and a girl talking. They were definitely running.
I began to job and as they began to pass me I quickly switched gears and started running their fast pace.
Instantly I felt great again.
Brand new person.
You bet in my head I was saying...
I am a (***king) machine.
He stated if we kept this pace up he wouldn't be able to hold on much longer and would slow down.
I honestly just wanted to continue forward in hopes that I will still feel good.
He began to hike and the girl and I continued to run forward.
I started to feel really good. My body definitely did not fell as though I had been running 95 mile prior and honestly I have felt worse in training runs.
Keep this momentum up.
She ends up hiking up a rocky section as I run by, feeling like I have gas in the tank I pick up my speed to Tonto Tavern, the last water only aidstation before the final 3.6 miles to the finish.
I fill up my hand held quickly and jog what seems like a downhill finish.
A girl and her pacer catch up to me and ask if I realize that we are on pace for a sub 23 hour finish.
I had no idea.
My intention was never for a sub 24 hour finish but to just finish. Yes, the idea of a sub 24 hour finish was nice but inevitably finishing was my only goal.
When she said a sub 23 hour- I didn't believe it.
When I had seen Kate Freeman at JJ she had said the same but I merely brushed it off. That's crazy.
This girl and her pacer confirmed that if we kept a good pace, we'd finish sub 23 hours.
With that- I bolted.
From running a 13 minute mile to running 8 minute miles for the last 3+mi stretch was exhilarating.
This was the only time, I realized, that I was breathing harder.
Steady breaths, but faster and my form was on point.
I felt strong.
I was flying.
I am a (***king) machine.
I am a (***king) machine.
Sawna you are a (***king) machine.
Still running fast I still wished every passing runner a solid finish.
Feeling strong, fast and pretty light on my feet I sprinted into the finish line.
Official time: 23:33:38
63rd overall
12th female.
Shocked beyond belief.
Words can not describe how proud I am of myself. Despite being doubtful of my training, my efforts and overall just myself and capabilities- I overcame all of it, stayed positive throughout the whole quest.
I set out on an adventure and an adventure I had and completed with flying colors.
I wouldn't have changed a thing.
Not one thing.
Everything accumulated into the experience and I think with one thing altered perhaps I would not have finished strong.
At the finish line Carlos asked if I thought I could run another lap and honestly, I think I had the energy to do so.
And that is what I am happy about:
To run a race, have fun and not beat my body up over it. I may not have ran my hardest but I ran smart and that is what I'm most proud of.
Unable to sleep I was able to greet the rest of the Coyote group and other finishers as they crossed the finish line.
What an experience.
Sitting by the warm fire I took a few shots of Jameson in hopes that it would keep me warm and make me tired but alas! it didn't accomplish either.
It went from cold to warm to HOT in a matter of an hour and as I was eating my Boca Burger and drinking a beer with my new friend Andrew from Portland- not fathoming the last 24 hours.
Did it really happen?
Around 11 am I was ready for a nap but could not imagine sleeping in the sauna that was our tent. Thankfully I was able to find a more comfortable, cooler spot within the Coyote area for a solid 30 min rest break.
I was able to pack most of my things into the car minus the tent. Carlitos was in-charge of the deconstruction of the tent as I sat in the air conditioned car.
The morning was spent cheering on every last finisher, a few tears shed, a plethora of hugs given and laughter shared.
Driving away from McDowell Regional Park both Carlos and I had felt as though we had just gotten there.
We drove about an hour to Glendale, AZ to my Uncle Dan's house.
I've been seeing my Uncle Dan and Connie more frequently in LA since my cousin Candice moved out here but I hadn't been to his house in Arizona since I was a wee cherub.
Carlos and I were welcomed with open arms and instantly it felt like home. I took a long hot shower, de tangled the rats nest that was my hair (still several knots from when I woke up like this).
Afterward I while drinking maybe a gallon of water I sat in their hot tub massaging my legs, I was surprised at how well I was moving.
The hot tub was clutch, the jets were strong and felt as though I was getting a back massage as I stretched my legs out.
It didn't take much time before my hands pruned.
By that time my cousin Megan, Tasha and Cohen were already there and we were ordering dinner.
It felt like a vacation.
Did I just run 100 miles with only 30 minutes of sleep since?
It really just feels like I'm out here visiting family, yes I'm moving slowly but this is some great times.
Once the food arrived my cousin Jordan and her adorable sun Gabriel arrived as well as her twin Taylor and her friend plus her new seeing dog!
It was a wonderful night, I talked about my race, we talked about the kids, Uncle Dan cracked some really awesome corny dad jokes (him and my dad should hang out more often).
The perfect ending to an incredible adventurous weekend.
We all gathered in the living room to watch the world series as we joked, told more stories and I enjoyed a glass a wine.
By 8:30pm I was ready for bed and that was it!
That's my weekend.
The next morning (Monday morning) I spent hanging out with Uncle Dan and Connie while drinking coffee, talking some more before Carlos woke up and we headed out. I woke up feeling like a brand new person, slept like a rock and arose with very minimal tightness. I spent a good 25 minutes stretching and getting that blood circulating more in my legs. I was intoxicated with happiness with how well my body felt. Soon after we left for the 5.5 hr drive back.
My dad met me just before I entered LA to drop Juniper off. He had watched her the last day since my roommate was not going to be home. Definitely thankful for my roommate Sam and for Mike taking her on runs everyday while I was gone.
Despite requesting Monday off from work, I received my schedule early Monday morning and I saw that I was on to work and surprisingly enough made it in time- worked a full shift no problem.
Weird.
I'm just going to go with it.
All in all- I ran; had fun, ate lots of avocado, dates and pickles, drank tons of water, peed in several different bushes, met some amazing trail folks, crossed the finish line and drank some beer.
It was a great time!
Many thanks to Carlos, my cheer squad, crew captain, driving buddy and overall friend that dedicated his whole weekend to aid my endeavor of running a 100 miles.
To Jimmy and Kate Freeman and all the coyotes for the invaluable amount of support not only during the weekend but the weeks leading up to it.
And of course my friends and family; despite them all thinking I'm pretty crazy, they always believe in encourage me to to finish anything I'm passionate about.
Now I'll let the dust settle before my next two races.
Orcas Island 50k.
Gorge Waterfall 100k.
Looking forward to seeing my new friends Jen and Andrew out in the PNW ;)
Till next time,
Peace, love and happiness.
Postscript.
I've had a puppy laying next to me the last few hours begging for some cuddles.
This probably wouldn't have taken me so long if I didn't stop every couple minutes to remind her what an angel face she has.
<3
