The Summer of Caffeine Freedom

I can’t believe I just typed those words but alas ‘tis true. In my effort to not fall asleep during my races this summer, I’ve decided to cut caffeine out of my diet. Let me tell you, I drink a lot of coffee, consume tons of caffeine daily- this decision was far from easy. Now, 10 days later I’m starting to believe I was slightly addicted. Coffee taste amazing, no doubt about that, but mostly I found that I really enjoyed the morning ritual of grinding, pouring and sipping my daily brew. I find now that I have a bit more free time in the morning and surprisingly more energy throughout the day instead of the usual afternoon crash.

In past races, Fatdog 120 and Cascade Crest 100 to be exact, I’ve found myself feeling overly vulnerable late at night, surpassing any point where caffeine would aid in any alertness. I have fallen asleep while running, standing, and a second into sitting on a log. That feeling, where you are unbearably tired to the point where it aches to keep you’re eyelids open isn’t something I’d like to repeat- yet I’m always so quick at ultrasignup race registrations.

My training has been less than ideal these last few months, between two dogs, moving to a different state and the stress of finding new employment, I’ve found little time and really not much enthusiasm in getting out and doing any sort of workouts. Moving from Bend to Boulder has definitely relit a spark of adventure and I plan to hold onto that excitement for as long as it lasts. Exploration has been my new side hustle and I look forward to adventuring around Colorado more.

This weekend I have the opportunity to explore the Tushar Mountain ranger while “running” Tushars 70k. The Tushar Mountains are located east of Beaver, Utah, about 190 miles south of Salt Lake City. Rising to over 12,000 feet in elevation, the Tushars are the third-highest mountain range in Utah. While I’m attempting my best to have fun during the race, Kelly and Howie will be running Ouray 100 and Tara will be running Highlonsome here in CO. Cheer them on virtually, in person, whatever you can to send some good vibes their way!

Many wonderful and terrible things have happened since my last post. Although there are probably close to two dozen half written posts on cue, I decided to put those aside for now and keep it lighthearted and casual. 2020 was filled with the most incredible adventures and yet heartbreak and death. I hope, for all of you, that 2021 has shown you more kindness than sorrow, adventure than staying static, hope rather than loss.

My rambling will now cease, now time to plan these adventures.

Peace, love and happiness,

Sawna

Photo by the incredible Hilary Matheson

Sun Mountain 50 miler

Photo By Glen Tachiyama

It’s been years since I’ve last ran a Rainshadow running race. They are known for putting on incredible events in some of the most beautiful areas of the Pacific Northwest like Beacon Rock State Park: waterfall central that is along the Colombia River Gorge, Oregons Coast town of Yachatas, Orcas Island among just a few. When the opportunity arose to travel back to the PNW to run a race of theirs I had yet to experience, needless to say I couldn’t wait to sign up.

The race is located on the Eastern and very sunny side of the North Cascades right outside a small town called Winthrop. The course offers great mountain trail running early in the year with endless fields of beautiful wildflowers, snow-capped peaks of the Cascades in the distance and a mix of stunning single-track and some fire roads to make up almost 8,000ft of climbing within those 50+ miles.

After running UTX 90k in Guatemala the transition to running, well, running consistently was a bit difficult. Focusing on less mileage and more vertical gain every week to now the complete opposite took some getting used to. I’d like to think my training and build for this race was pretty consistent and my body felt great, for the most part. Just a few weeks before the race I strained my left foot and despite feeling as though I could still run on it, I decided to give it a rest in order for it to properly heal before the big dance. I felt as though being healthy going forward was more important than solidifying my training for what was supposed to be my training race for an upcoming 100 miler this summer.

Race morning began like you would normally imagine: wake up way too early thinking you’ve missed your alarm to only find out you still have another hour or so and repeat until you finally just get out of bed and make coffee.

Hilary, Eamon, Me, Rhea, and Andrew looking super fresh right before the race. Can my socks be brighter? :)

In Washington right now the sun rises around 5:30 making a 6am start time pretty fabulous. The sun lit the trails while the wildflowers sparkled under its rays. It was going to be a beautiful day.

The race began with a slight downhill before a turn on a single track that took you up a trail and over some of the neighboring hills. The conga line quickly started once the single track showed the slightest sign of climbing. Eamon and I giggled at the thought of walking this section when this seemed like anthills compared to the climbing in Guatemala. But we trekked on.

Mile 2, maybe? Still very happy!

Photo by Hilary

When I think of my day in its entirety, I find that its slightly blurred between being extremely thankful to be running in such a beautiful area and upset that I was running at all. It only took a few miles before my foot began to hurt as I went through the motion of bending it. I decided to slow my speed with the idea that it would mitigate any more pain, but unfortunately it just got worse. I continued forward, talking to whomever I was able to run with for a few minutes or just using my Jaybirds to listen to music in one ear (Jaybirds pro FOR THE WIN-lasted the entire race+had extra battery life). I have never listened to music during races, but I knew that I would just dwell on the pain if not distracted.

In previous races I have had issues with my electrolyte intake. It’s either I’m not taking enough or I’m taking far too much and both result in cramping. Today was no different. I wanted to use this race to find some sort of balance, but what I eventually found was myself on the side of the trail holding onto my left quad as the entire leg seized up in a orchestra of cramps-the finale being my foot. I focused on my breathing and slowed my run to a mere jog after that. Any time I felt as though I could start running at a faster speed my quad sang a little melody of cramps as a reminder of what it could do.

I found myself spiraling down a dark tunnel, upset that I couldn’t run the way I had trained nor felt happy. Why did I sign up? Why am I putting myself through this suffer fest? I continued on my cruise control effort while other runners passing me and trying to stay positive. During this time I decided to hit rock bottom-the ground I mean and give it a good hug as my body completely seized up. I laid there for a few minutes focusing on breathing and slowly moving everything in order to get up. My foot decided it would stay stiff and not bend-it definitely hurt. Ba-humbug as I think of the excess of electrolytes I’ve taken that resulted in my body screaming now-definitely a learning lesson.

“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.”

— Winston Churchill

I continued in my dark thoughts of why running might not be for me, why am I even excited to run 100 milers, what was I thinking? All questions you ask yourself while in the suffer fest. As I pass the water only station and begin the next climb, I think of all my past efforts this year and how terrible I’ve felt in each of them, yet here I am! As I near the top of the climb and continue over the ridge, a carpet of wildflowers cover the entire mountain side while the snow capped cascades dance in the distance, I think of all the other things I could be doing at this moment. I quickly snap back into reality. Yes, there is a plethora of different things I could be doing at this moment yet there is only one thing I want to be doing: running right here, right now. I find myself smiling despite the pain and laugh at myself; days like today help me appreciate the better days of tomorrow. So I slapped the negative attitude right out of me while singing "Don’t stop me now” by Queen while embracing my cruise control speed to the next aid station. I apologize for anyone who had to deal with my high pitch screeching I call singing.

Photo by Glenn Tachiyama. It’s a shame there wasn’t any flowers around ;)

Continuing forward, I focus on one step at a time and begin to enjoy the process. Yes, maybe I was in discomfort but it was bearable. I knew I’d have ample time to recover and get back to training but having these experiences and adapting is such an incredible thing. I had pretty much the worst cramps, I missed a turn and added a good mile and some to my day, my foot stopped functioning properly but I still consider this a win of a day. My god was the landscape just breathtaking, the volunteers incredible, and the day just beautiful, but everything in between was the best part of the journey.

No flowers here either

Every mile of this race was an experience of the greatest growth. A reminder that not all goals end the way we hope but they most certainly shape us into a better, more powerful version of ourselves. It takes time, but learning not to fear the end result, rather choose to be courageous in every aspect of the journey and still going for it-the goal. Maybe I didn’t get the day I wanted, rather I had the day I needed. A reminder that even after 5 years of running I, too, am constantly learning. A day filled with exploration, searching, finding and achieving new ideas that will make me a better athlete in the future. A lot of things that are the most rewarding I find are very type two fun, right? They’re not necessarily fun when you’re doing them, but I feel a lot more growth and fulfillment from it afterward and I think those lessons play well into being able to continue to push and grow in future endeavors.

“The past can hurt, but... you can either run from it, or learn from it.”

— Rafiki, The Lion King

Thank you Rainshadow Running crew for yet another memorable day. Either way, it was a beautiful day to experience some trails I wouldn’t have seen otherwise! Thankful everyday for a body that lets me travel and see this world with the people I love. So many friends ran Sun Mountain and had different days, congratulations to each and every one of you for even just toeing the start line. You are all incredible!

Who’s serving the margaritas- I’ve got plenty of salt to go around!

Upon crossing the finish- all I wanted was a dip in the lake!

Somehow still snagged 10th in a very stacked race.

Mis Amigos! Congrats to Andrew and Rhea for a stellar race!

As I sit here resting post epic sports massage(Thank you JULIO) and recovering while listening to the rhythm of the sound of rain outside, yes it does rain in LA, I’m filled with gratitude toward the weekend. Perhaps I’m not out running as I’d like to be but this time allows me a reflection process of what lessons I learned and the moments I gained from this past weekend. Experiences I hope to use as a tool to better myself for the upcoming months.

The countdown begins, 5th on the wait list for Angeles Crest 100 and after 5 years I’m pretty stoked to get to race on that course again.

OK. Question for you:

What is your go to songs that pump you up in a race?

What do you find works for you to balance electrolyte issues. (When it’s really hot out).

Favorite mantra?

Help a sista out and leave a comment :)

Till next time!

Ultrarunningmemes FOR THE WIN- @andrewisadrummer understands

Ultrarunningmemes! @Anotherultrarunner after canyons 100k

Expect the unexpected

We sit in the parked car as Tam, Andrew and Rhea all begin to layer up I stuff another chip in my mouth delaying the inevitable- going outside. See, I convinced Tam to visit from the UK, hardly convinced but used the beautiful weather we've been having as an incentive to spend a few days in town. I eat another chip covered in hummus as my gaze continues forward, looking at what? I couldn't tell you. We were in the clouds, a dense white fog left us with zero visibility and a light shower to remind us of the current freezing temperature. It was 32 degrees parked at Vincent Gap. "At first I was afraid, I was petrified" Gloria Gaynor belts out in the background. No, girlfriend, I don't think I will survive, not this weather. Sawna is a sun child. 

The day we departed from Drakes Bay. 6 Days and 146 miles later...

Tam arrived from London the night before. We had spent 6 beautifully hard days in Costa Rica running the Coastal Challenge, what now seems like another lifetime ago and not just a mere 3 months. She had messaged me about visiting San Diego and had mentioned possibly hanging out. We quickly decided on her visiting for two days, some sunshine and warmth would do her good. What we didn't know was that the 80 degree weather we have been having would immediately disappear once she arrived, she didn't realize she had packed the fog with her. Thank you for that, Tam.

I was determined to make these two days incredible. If not for Tam, for my two days off from the stress of work. The last few weeks of working long hours at a bar has not been ideal, most evening spent coming home and melting into the couch unable to function. I had messaged Andrew, Rhea and Tony and we made fast plans on camping no matter the weather. We considered Horse Shoe Meadows but the weather nixed that immediately, the San Gabes seem to be the only place we'd be able to go. 

We all sit in the car, shivering, questioning our decisions. Tony decided to head back to Buckhorn and set up camp, it would be too difficult for Lou, his 14 year old dalmatian in this sort of weather. Thankfully I packed extra warm clothing for this unexpected temperatures. Tam had no idea what I was putting her through as we glance at each other with forced smiles, this will be fun, we reassure each other in a very unconvincing way. I stay positive and say things like "I'd rather be here than sitting at home" "better than working", but at the same time I was questioning my own choices. It was never the question of whether it was safe or not, it wasn't a huge storm we were walking into, but just an uncomfortable situation. After putting on what felt like a million layers we begin our trek up Baden Powell only to stop a few switch backs up and remove 999,999,999 of those layers. Although temps were in the 30's, the air was still and the more we hiked up, the warmer it got, and the more genuine our smiles became. We were deep in the clouds, unable to see around the switchbacks due to the thick fog. Despite the poor visibility and freezing temps we were having a great time! The dogs, Juniper and Lola, were running around, tongues out and chasing each other up and down the mountain as we all talked and enjoyed each others company. About three miles up we noticed the snow and icicles hanging from the trees. A round of a-paws for to the San Gabes for the ins-paw-rational snowy mountain views. Boy was this polar opposite of the 80 degree day I had on this mountain just last week, that day I could've definitely gone for a pupsicle. Get it, get it? Woof. 

We made our way to the peak of Baden Powell along with 10 or so PCT hikers. The hikers, hiking from the boarder of Mexico to Canada along the Pacific Crest Trail, were carrying large packs to get them through the 2,650 mile quest, while we were carrying mere small vests. Reaching Baden Powell at 9,399 ft on clear days often grants you a 360 view of the San Gabriel Mountains, however, on a day like today we were lucky to see 5 feet in front of us. Despite the lack of view, I tried to illustrate the views as best as I could to Tam. We all took photos and hung around at the top long enough for some cloud breaks. There were definitely some screams of joy coming from our group. 

Our run down the mountain was exciting. Oh the joys of running in tights and it inevitably sagging off my hips. Saggy crotch syndrome I like to call running tights. We had spurts of heat and cold as we began our descent, running through flurries of snow, icycles dangling from above, spurts of open views of the desert below and soft moist dirt below our feet. I couldn't help but giggle from happiness. Today was a good day. 

Our drive to camp was a mixture of defrosting and delayering from the days adventure. We packed our packs as best we could and headed to post up our campsite. It was a surprise to stumble upon three PCT hikers with a fire going in the big pit, I immediately said hi, attracted to the heat they were creating, and offered the wood I brought as a donation if we could hang out by their fire. They quickly accepted. After setting up our tents, we grabbed our snacks and made friends with Captain America, Butcher, and Jukebox. 

The evening was spent making new friends and hanging with old friends. The pups were pooped out and hung by the fire while we enjoyed some beers and eat lots of food. Well I ate a lot of food. After what seemed like hours of talking, we snuggled up into our tents around a whooping 9:30pm. I woke around 3 am, trying to convince myself that I should go back to sleep and that the need to pee wasn't dire, but my bladder rejected my argument. I crawled out of my tent to a soft white carpet, a few inches of snow while snow floated around me. If the need to pee wasn't necessary at that moment I would've spent more time enjoying just being still. It's not everyday in the San Gabes that you get to camp while its snowing. Full of excitement I almost woke Tam to tell her it was snowing, then remembered, she lives in the UK- she see's fog, snow, and rain all the time. She was actually trying to get a vacation from that sorta weather. Surprise, surprise, here we are in sub 30 degree temps in what was supposed to be sunny Southern California. 

The morning was spent trying to keep our hands warm all whilst not getting falling snow into our coffee. Our coffee didn't stay very warm too long. That was our cue to pack up and head out. 

I wanted to show Tam one last thing before she headed off to what will be sunny San Diego, Strawberry Peak. Oh the beautiful Strawberry Peak, views of the San Gabes and Los Angeles in the distance, but today, barely the trail infront of us was visible. Alas! I made my attempt but mother nature was not in our favor. We climbed and ran back to the car with a rumble in our stomach. We were in need of a hearty lunch, our last stop being my favorite, Cafe Gratitude. 

Since her visit, it's been nearly 80 degrees everyday while I've been enjoying it in the discomfort of work. I've surprised myself by waking each day by 6 and going for run in Griffith Park in order for Juniper, and myself, to get some exercise in before a long work day. 

T-minus 3 days till I'm on a flight to Seattle and reunited with some of my favorite people while running around ORCAS ISLAND. 

I've never been to Orcas when it wasn't in Feb for Rainshadows 50k... the STOKE IS HIGH. Will be in Seattle Sunday evening till Monday night if anyone wants to hang out. Literally, lets go climbing. 

Till next time. 

Thank you Tam for visiting <3

I have several similar photos and each one Junipers smiles is HUGE. <3

Can we all admire how cool Andrew is with Lola who weights WAY less than Juniper.

My unsuccessful attempt to be cool like Andrew:

Ok, Ok, last thing.

Just wanted to wish Tony a happy 30th Birthday. HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY BDAY!

Our adventures wouldn't be the same without him. He somehow knows how to make you smile a bit wider, laugh a bit harder and love way way more. We are all thankful to have you and your pups in our lives! I know Juniper loves me but lets be honest, she'd join your pack in a heartbeat!